Hi, Nigel,
We haven’t met though I’ve always hoped to- and still hope to- but I have known Simon (Fuller) for quite a long time. My Daughter even worked for 19 and on “Pop Idol” and the first season of “American Idol.” The man is a bloody genius and what he has been able to do for the Beckhams, Carrie Underwood, his loyalty and support for the brilliant Annie Lennox and how he has taken 19 into “The Little Company That Could” and Roman numerals is something which makes me very chuffed as I admire the man and await to see what he and the legend that is Chris Blackwell have in store for us with their artist-focused ventured.
Of course, his creation- “Idol”- and which you-know-who came close to hijacking and tried to give the impression to the American media that he was more than just “hired help” and a “Mr. Nasty” character, apparently, based on your early days as a young and arrogant A&R person- weren’t we all?- remains the highlight of Simon’s “CV.” It’s sure come a long way from a night many years ago when his Mum mentioned the show to me at an SClub7 concert and how Pepsi and British Telecom had come onboard. I was busy watching Rachel from SClub! Whatever happened to her?
Love it or hate it or even take it in small doses, no one has not been able to escape “American Idol” and the franchise it has become. But, this Season, hmmmm, something has gone very wrong. Perhaps it’s run its course and run out of puff, at the same time, perhaps, it has all become a bit homogenized. It’s starting to look and sound- gawd forbid- like a Miss Universe or to be more precise, a Miss American pageant. All that’s missing is that knob named Donald Trump as a judge. The “evil” Simon and The Donald should team up and create a new show. It will be a marriage made in Publicity Heaven. Or Hell.
On the subject of judges, when they first appeared on the show, Jennifer Lopez and Steve Tyler were an excellent “foil/breather” from and for Randy Jackson and his inane “Dawg Pound” chatter. Hell, the man is a brilliant bass guitarist and a Producer who has worked with some of the biggest names in showbiz/ But, over the years, he had been reduced to being some weird version of an “Uncle Tom” who had been to down to the ghetto- once- and has been trying hard to be hip with a little bit of Hop, but has ended up, as they say in Oz, coming across as a try-hard. His days at the only Black guy with Journey must have played havoc with his psyche.
Still, in those early days and even the “latter years” and when everyone waited for “Mr. Nasty” to speak- and gawd he did go on, spitting out the same old rehearsed lines– what “The Dawg” said didn’t matter. He, Paula Abdul when she was “there”- in more ways than one, that obnoxious but attractive songwriter and, for a short time Ellen DeGeneres, were props for “Mr.Nasty”. Today, most of us just don’t listen to this holy trinity of judges. “The Dawg” seems to be modeling his line of fashion wear and everyone is sooooo over-dressed, it all looks like “Project:Runway” which has run away and taken off into some other orbit. Does anyone really listen to what they have to say?
I mean, come on, Nigel, at 41, Jennifer Lopez is a gorgeous looking woman but there’s very little difference between her speaking voice and “singing” voice. Her “singing” has always been about the beat and rhythms. So, when she offers these young contestants advice, I smile to myself while looking at her bangles, baubles and bright shiny things. Guess so do many middle-aged women from “Middle America” who form the heartbeat and backbone of the “Idol” audience and to which the show must pander. J-Lo, or “Jenny From The Block” or Miss Lopez also gushes a great deal. Sure I love to watch her stand up and down and jiggle about. Wouldn’t any red-blooded man? But, after a while, it all becomes boring. It’s like having access to too much porn and wanting to see some women with their clothes on and sucking on a lollipop instead of a P Diddy man stick.
The first season he appeared, Steve Tyler was great: He was caustic, he was weird, he was unpredictable and reminded many of a dressed-up “Wavy Gravy” who had survived Woodstock.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JmwUIhLYRhY
This season, it’s more of the same . He only woke up from “Dream On” to chastise that annoying Korean kid who kinda embarrassed an Asian like myself by singing like that doofus who hosts “Yan Can Cook” or Jackie Chan playing the dumbass Chinamen who speaks “bloken Engris.” It’s not what Bruce Lee tried so hard to give us: Asian Pride.
As for the “Dawg,” even though there has been the introduction of some “tension” between him and Mr.Jimmy Iovine, it’s more of what I call, Meh, who cares? I was looking forward to Jimmy Iovine being on the show along with his posse of producers and thought that he would make for far better “television”- and even better music. But, it hasn’t happened and we’re now back to token appearances of some “mentors.” Yeah, maybe it’s “good television”, but these are just celebrity cameos and not any bona fide “mentoring.” If managing an artist- and which is a thankless task, so no Thanks- would I wanna see Stevie Nicks offering singing advice to them? Hell, no. Stevie Nicks? Take Lindsay Buckingham away from her and any of the male singers with whom she has recorded and what do you have? Yes, “only Stevie Nicks” and how much of her whining can one take even when she was at the height of her popularity with Fleetwood Mac? This is why Fleetwood Mac worked: Stevie Nicks was used sparingly and with the great Christine McVie taking over the lead vocal chores along with the brilliant Lindsay Buckingham. Personally, he can mentor me anytime and remains such an underrated talent.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uJ921K-ylbw
Getting back to “American Idol,” you need to visit sites like www.fark.com and see what’s going on there and how votes are being rgged/fixed so that the bad ones stay and the good ones are “voted off.” It’s unfair to many contestants when the Korean guy is “voted in” and someone infinitely better is voted off- as a “joke”- but much has happened since twelve years ago and when texting votes was something unique. Today, the genie has been let out and he’s a mischievous genie and playing hell with everything and anything online. The day when “Anonymous” and hackers target “Idol” is probably not far behind. Maybe it’s already happened.
The show, as mentioned, is reminding me more and more of a Miss American Pageant as so many are thanking the God person for everything. Nothing wrong with this, but it does remind me of Right Wing Christian zealots and “American Idol” almost becoming the musical equivalent of Fox News. There are days when I expect Bill O’Rellly to be a guest judge. Then there is the music and it really is old-fashioned schlock compared to the songs chosen and sung by the contestants on “The Voice.” “The Voice” is the new cool of half-arsed television singing contests and the best of a bad lot.
As for the songs selected on “Idols”- and “Pop Idols” are meant to be young- perhaps, there’s a problem dealing with music publishers and getting their approval for songs to be quickly recorded and downloaded via iTunes. But, Nigel. mate, these young contestants singing songs written by Elton John and other great- and very old- songwriters- and whose songs have become part of the repertoire of lounge singers and old-timers milking Vegas dry, makes everything look and sound much older and pedestrian than it should be. Some twentysomething trying to outdo or mimic a Whitney or a Mariah or a Celine or a Robert Plant is just embarrassing.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Usn3o3kle44
There was one recent week where Miss Lopez kept standing up and giving standing ovations to nearly every act and I had to wonder if she- and the other two- were hearing what we were hearing at home. What we were hearing were contestants hitting some awfully sharp notes which even made my dog start to howl. The kid singing in falsetto was bloody awful as was the way over-the-top version of “Without You”. Iovine should have made him listen to Nilsson’s version of the song and the original by Badfinger. Tthe woman jumping around the stage trying to channel Robert Plant was just, well silly. It was almost two hours of total crap made even worse by those “High School Music-meets-Glee” sing-alongs by trios of contestants.
Again, perhaps all this goes down a treat with the Mums and kids watching the show, but it all looks pretty desperate and with the kitchen sink thrown in to try and hide the pock-marks OR the fact that “American Idol” has done everything it possibly can and is now lost and dazed and confused? I don’t know, but as Executive Producer of the show, it’s not looking or sounding good, Nigel.
I never thought I’d say it, but “The Voice” is one helluva lot better- and without even a hint of the God Person and not appealing to an audience of almost trained chimpanzees who applaud every time someone hits a high note- no matter how sharp it is- or goes into rapture when some kid decides to growl like “Satchmo.” It’s just a bad shtick, mate which has gone forever. Please stop that “APPLAUSE” sign from going up at the wrong times. It makes me cringe at those who wouldn’t known sharp from flat and theatrics and hysterics from passion. It all ends up like the worst karaoke session.
Bottom line: “American Idol” has bottomed out. It cannot be resurrected. The world has changed and with it, technology.
Sorry, Nigel, but your show is has run outta gas and ideas and is in the Dark Ages.
Screw “ratings”: They don’t matter one iota to viewers- and soon, sponsors/advertisers.
That well-presented cup of Coca-Cola has become way too obvious- and uncool.
And how many want to write lyrics for a melody by Jason Derulo? Who he?
To this viewer who followed “Idol” like some blinkered sheep for years, the blinkers are off and what I see, I don’t like.
It might be “good television” but it’s helluva bad for music and Jimmy Iovine comes off as the biggest fakir- and faker- of them all.
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