Cryptic notes from the crib
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POP THE BUBBLE, FACE THE TRUTH
We’re all at war with an invisible enemy
No one’s doing better than the other
It’s come down to how to fight the fear
that keeps us from being with one another
Fear is often the greatest enemy
It starts when you’re always afraid
Can’t remember where that line came from
But it keeps playing around in my head
Too scared to go out and enjoy life
Cos that thing called fun might kill you
Who’s making these rules up as they go?
Every day there’s something new
Believe in men of science, they said
That now seems an eternity ago
What’s there to believe in these days
Even what meant so much before
There’s too much selfishness taking place
One for you and five for me
Hope this give and take is ending fast
It’s tiring being on bended knee
Hamsters going around on a treadmill
This isn’t how to win the race
Who’s thinking about the children?
Making sure their future’s looking great
The mind is always a fragile place
It’s where unknown games are played
It’s where bad dreams lie in waiting
And pounce when you’re least afraid
Politicians have become medicine men
And the sheep blindly follow and believe
But these leaders are as lost as you and me
They’re in bubbles of varying degrees
Our priorities have all gone wrong
Money is never everything and more
If you really want to play to win
Don’t throw down those snake eyes four
The writers know what’s going on
They’ve always seen through empty talk
They’ve seen incompetence rewarded
And what’s behind those power walks
Tough questions are now finally being asked
And the monkey refuses to dance
It’s time for questioning everything
If we’re gonna have a second chance
A changing of the guard is taking place
The independents see what’s going wrong
It’s how those walls of Jericho fell
And his master’s voice lost his song
Has-beens are still tweeting to be heard
Others are busy jumping every ship
There are no wizards and no leadership skills
Even good old Giles got caught at slips
No more magic millions bought by sycophants
They don’t belong in the Here and Now
The messiah is no longer calling the shots
It’s time to finally wave them all ciao ciao
Copyright © Hans Ebert
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WHERE ARE TODAY’S ROCK STAR JOCKEYS?
Sure, there are some brilliant jockeys- James McDonald, very possibly the best Jockey riding in the world today- whatever “the best” means- Zac Purton, Joao Moreira, perhaps, Jamie Kah...and then?
Anyone with sponsorship appeal? And more on this very soon as the marketing of jockeys- and horse racing- remains in the Dark Ages.
Where, however, are those riders with that edge?
Someone with the flamboyant personality and remarkable backstory of a Frankie?
Someone with the communication skill sets needed to seduce the mainstream media and be a brand like Lewis Hamilton has become?
While we leave you to ponder all this, here’s our Top 5 All Time Favourite Rock Star Jockeys.
If only social media and endorsement deals were around when these riders were at the very top of their game, horse racing today just might have a completely different and Group 1 brand image with, yes, global sponsorship appeal.
Eric Saint Martin
He not only had, and still has great hair, and as a race rider, he had beautiful hands, an impeccable sense of timing that somehow kinda went together with the somewhat erratic use of his incredible talent.
For our money, Eric Saint Martin is the best and most stylish rider ever seen in Hong Kong- and Macau.
He’s also something of an enigma which added so much to his Rock’n Roll persona.
The Hong Kong Jockey Club had no idea what to do with him as he just didn’t care about authority. Like the time when he immediately left for Paris with his family during the SARS crisis because he didn’t want to die. Good enough reason.
Frankie Dettori
He’s Frankie, simple as that. And who else has cheated death- remember the plane crash?- and comeback when it looked like his career was finito? An amazing human being.
Olivier Doleuze
Flamboyant, always wore his heart on his sleeve, a terrific crowd favourite, martial arts expert and part time DJ!
Gerald Mosse
Stylish, experienced, super successful, a wonderful rider and extremely popular with the ladies.
Christophe Soumillon
A great rider, very much married and which doesn’t stop chicks really digging him.
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GROUND CONTROL TO MAJOR TOM...CAN YOU HEAR ME, MAJOR TOM?
Our hearts went out to Warren Huntley while he was holding down Victoria racing’s RSN fort on Saturday morning and doing the best he could to interview trainers and tipsters...plus wrestling with the Dead People’s radio channel’s bum communications setup when people call in.
Led Zeppelin has even sung about it. Remember “Communication Breakdown” with that head banging opening guitar riff from Jimmy Page and Robert Plant screaming about wanting to be a backdoor man? We do.
These Saturday morning communication breakdowns are a serial problem for the radio channel- breakdowns and people talking as if they have socks in their mouths.
The worst of the phone-ins on Saturday was when some gruff sounding bloke named- we think- Kev- called in with his tips for Rosehill. Apart from being helluva long-winded, his alien sounding voice seemed to be coming through the wires of one of those old time B Grade sci fi movie. It was an Ed Wood production. Cheap.
As for the “tips”, well, when Kir Royal didn’t run a place in the first at Rosehill and English Riviera was rolled in the first at Flemington, we had to shake our heads and wonder about the point of sitting through those convoluted and often pointless betting “game plans”.
Earlier, a garbled sounding Unchained One phoned in from a planet far far away to join his two co-hosts to interview jockey Ben Thompson, who seemed, quite rightfully, lost for words.
No one seemed to understand half of what was being said. The other half sounded just plain goofy.
Having said this, we’ve got used to Matthew and enjoy the truths he lays on the table like his thoughts about the overblown Magic Millions hootenanny last Saturday with constant references to participants recovering from hangovers.
Little wonder then that a few trainers we know mentioned how they’d be very surprised if those who made “successful bids” even remember that they did.
But tax losses can be a good thing, right?
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Arise, Lord Campo!
Congrats to good guy and one-time Racing Specialist of the Hong Kong Jockey Club Adam Campton.
Now following his dream of being a trainer and whose Gold Coast based stable made a great start to their fledgling operations when their first runner- the former Victorian galloper Lord Markel- won at Warwick on Saturday.
A winner is a winner and 6-1 is 6-1 on any tote anywhere in the world and Lord Markel was given a very good ride by Zac Lloyd, son of the Guv’nor.
Well done, guys!
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RACING TO WIN TURN TO TWINKY-WINKY, DIPSY, LAA LA AND PO...
That always evolving HKJC tipping programme Racing To Win seems to now have Teletubbies music playing in the background.
This happens as, onscreen, Twinky-Winky, Dipsy, Laa La and Po go through their thoughts, play with Speed Maps, reveal their four picks for each race and, whenever he’s interviewed, Joao Moreira conducting another Masterclass in diplomacy and public relations. It’s magic.
His recent interview about winning on Astrologist- a rare ride for Douglas Whyte and which brought up the legendary champion Hong Kong Jockey’s 100th winner as Trainer- was absolutely brilliant. And let’s never ever forget that DW is no rookie when it comes to public relations.
As for the Teletubbies music, one guesses someone in Broadcasting has stumbled on a new customer base for the programme instead of continuing to focus on racing’s Uncles and, these days, grandpas.
