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The new way of looking at horse racing

The Ballad of the 2013-2014 Season


Ballad 1

The new season got off to a rocky start With a man-sized collision that came apart Whyte and Size went their separate ways Whatever happened to those Glorious Days?


Ballad 2

The Champ took it all in his stride Akeed Mofeed and Glorious Days gave him two great rides Two Group 1 wins on International Day Was a two-finger salute that said, “I’m more than Okay”!


2 fingers

The Zac Attack and Moore The Merrier Looked destined for days far more rosier But a Military Attack suddenly rocked their buddy thing The bromance became a “love you short-time” kinda fling


Ballad 4

Then it went Poof and magic lit up the sky The Magic Man was here and looked so fly Everyone tried to jump the queue And become part of the “Hey Joao” Samba Le Bamba crew


Ballad 5

He rode doubles, trebles and four-timers And Hong Kong racing was never this much finer Racing fans couldn’t get enough of his rides But then neither could those gawd damn stickly Stipes!


Ballad 6

And while the winners came thick and fast Many days were spent there in the back Suspensions turned to mighty big fines And doing magic tricks became an expensive crime!


Ballad 7

How much longer will all the Magic last? Could it all fade into the past? Joao knows he has nada to fear He’s done a Suarez right from the rear!


Ballad 8

Through it all there’s been the launch of many Zac Attacks All of them have been really whack “Aussie! Aussie! Aussie!” his twittering fans tweet Adding Oi! Oi! Oi! to that constant Okker dance beat!


Ballad 9

Dougie Whyte just sits and smiles At those goons across the aisle He plays his cards close to his chest Always a new door opens to give him the best .


Ballad 10

Tommy Boy arrived in town He came with a Berry big Berry crown But then like E.T. he wanted Home And old man Moore was left there all alone


Ballad 11

Neil Callan created racing history He beat the Stipes and won a big victory But when you win you also lose And suspensions galore cooked his goose


Miscarriage and Loss: You Win Some, You Lose Some

Hughie Bowman came, saw and won He really didn’t hang about too long And many are singing the Christian Reith song “A six month license in- huh?- Hong Kong?”


Ballad 13

So the curtain falls on another season And this might sound like mutiny and treason But what if when there’s the new trainers score There could be the name of- yikes- Sydney’s Gary Moore???


Ballad 14

New riders will come and make up the numbers But so could many worthless plumbers And what about Dickie, Alvin and Matthoooooo? And Huckleberry Hound and even more Boo Boos?


Ballad 15

Turnover will continue to go through the roof Despite Billy Boy and the corporate goofs Will co-mingling and that old China dream Be the wanker fests they’ve always been?


Ballad 16

Don’t trust anyone we’ve always heard There’s a Judas in all those nicely rehearsed words No one’s who they appear to be All those ankle biters and human fleas.


Ballad 17

Hong Kong racing still holds the key While everyone else is all at sea Has-beens and never-beens are on the winning side Stop whinging you fools and enjoy the ride!


Ballad 18

Willie Shakes

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