Jockey of the Year
Matthew Chadwick
Determined, driven, tough, winner of the Tony Cruz Award, rarely smiles, kinda morose, and almost had some of us doing the Berlin Tango had the galloper of the same name got up in the last on Wednesday at Happy Valley. Lost by very Siu Siu...
_______________ The Scarlet Pimpernel and Keyser Soze Awards
Blake Shinn and Blake Shinn
They seek him here, they seek him there- whoah,doggies- he’s suddenly riding in Singapore!
It’s not often that a jockey leaves the mighty Hong Kong Jockey Club with so much egg on its face. But he did it. How? By saying one thing, doing something completely different and leaving Hong Kong a much richer man-like many have done for decades.
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The Invisible Man Award
Jockey Jerry Chau
After hitting the ground running when indentured to Trainer Douglas Whyte as a ten pound claiming apprentice, things have slowed down to a trickle for Jer after his former boss dropped him like a hot char siu bao and with rides been in short supply.
Still, he remains the one jockey who has the only official fan club in Hong Kong and is already the owner of a spanking new luxury apartment.
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The Happiness Is Award
Jockey Keith Yeung riding his first winner in a long time after an injury plagued season at the last race meeting of the season on Wednesday.
Happiness beautifully captured by the man with the weird Twitter handle- @wallacewanck
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The Hot Toddy Award
Masterchef Sarah Todd
Nah, she’s got nothing to do with horse racing. Just throwing it out there along with her new line of Hot Toddy chilli sauces.
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There’s No Business Like Show Business Award
The Zac And João Show
Bigger than Batman and Superman! More entertaining than The Road Runner and Wile E Coyote! Hotter than Blazing Saddles! More weird than Young Frankenstein! Well, you get the picture...
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The Happy Wednesday Happy Endings Award
Jockey Lyle “Happy” Hewitson
No jockey this season has owned the Happy Valley Racecourse like “Happy” Hewitson who rode almost a winner at every meeting for the past few months at the city with, of course, invaluable support from one-time Champion city slicker Douglas Whyte.
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The Vertigo Award
Basically any goofy Riding High Together piece of communication spanning almost two decades from the Hong Kong Jockey Club.
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The Man Of Peace Award
Zac Purton
As the star jockey and influencer will be heading to the Maldives for a break with his family during the off-season, word is that he might meet up with President Gotayaba Rajapaksa of Sri Lanka, who fled the island to avoid losing his head.
It’s hoped that Zac’s persuasive skills- “Mate, give it up”- could persuade the disgraced Sri Lankan twat to give himself up and face the music.
Zac pays off Sri Lanka's trillion-dollar debt, and buys the island paradise for the price of a damn good crab curry.
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The Tik Tok Award
The weird Casibah Alien Dance
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Predictions for the 2022-23 Season
Though offered the chance to be the new Bond, Andrew Le Jeune knocks it back to be the new Batman. The former Hong Kong based racing presenter is quoted as saying, “I think I look quite dashing in a cape. I had the idea of wearing one on Racing To Win, but it was thought to be too outré”.
Zac appears as a judge on Masterchef Australia...
Douglas Whyte stars in a remake of Beetlejuice
* It’s finally explained that commingling and co-habitation are two very different things.
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