What a strange couple of days it has been in the racing world: Buffering had many Suffering by not even being able to run a place in Friday night’s Manikato Stakes. Then, to underline the fickleness of horse racing, Gerard Mosse gets dumped off Americain in the Melbourne Cup and with the ride now going to Damien Oliver who’s fighting his own battles for pride and honour.
Of less importance, but very bizarre was seeing the $1.40 favourite at Morphetville in race one on Saturday come last in a four horse field and which underlines the perils of betting where there are small fields. The winner paid 5s. Now, I ask you, is that fucking weird or not?
On more positive notes, one of my favourite people- jockey Michael Rodd- separated the men from the boys by downing the “unbeatable” Its A Dundeel” ridden by James McDonald with a Super Cool ride aboard, well, Super Cool whereas Bossy answered the question of Who’s The Boss by taking out the Cox Plate on the Gary Hennessy-trained Ocean Park, which has a very strong Hong Kong connection via co-owner Steve Yan. As for the hot favourite in the race- Green Moon- it sunk without trace and was never ever a hope of even running a place. So much for “form”. But what a great run by All Too Hard to run second.
Overall, how was Cox Plate Day? Perhaps I’m getting too cynical about racing, but with so many races in Oz and so many totes, bookies, pundits and race callers, it’s all starting to look and sound the same and is fast becoming a perilously tedious sport and just not “sexy” enough. And purely focusing on betting is not sexy. Even the horses are looking bored.
Like tipsters, do we really need race callers when we can watch the race ourselves? Just show us which numbers are leading. And if we must persist with race callers, must they be so damn boring and where clichés like “It’s boxed in” and “sweeping down the outside” and “getting an inside run” are sounding decidedly old-fashioned and on remote compared to what I call what COULD be heard on an “Indie racing channel”?
“Yes, racing fans, small fish with internal fortitude taste sweet. And now over to Dean Lester.”
Here, there can be fashion, and lifestyle and those who want to watch twenty minutes of horses going walkabout can do so by switching on to the usual old fart channels and with this “Indie channel” also having a new breed of race-callers who are obligated to no one and can scream out Truthisms like, “What on earth is that fuckwit doing on the favourite?” or “Hell, that horse was dead, dead, dead!” and “I could have ridden that thing better.” Armchair critics should rise and take over and form their own racing channel and which is far more “for the people and by the people.”
Meanwhile, in Hong Kong, racing returns to Shatin on Sunday after Wednesday Night’s Gagnam Night at Happy Valley when the real winner were the Horsy dance moves in the Beer Garden and the Gangnam style wedding.
Other than that, I am scratching my nuts wondering about the hard-working Eddie Lai who is not riding tomorrow after breaking a finger at track work and also copped a six meeting ban for “improper riding” for which he pleaded guilty as charged. Still, it’s something that has tongues wagging amongst the jockeys and training ranks. I never saw what happened so I am in the dark about this one, but, apparently, the punishment doesn’t fit the crime. And now, poor Eddie has been given the finger.
Too much tongue wagging causes headaches like the above.
Wednesday was also the evening when champion jockey and champion bloke Dougie Whyte- yes, it’s the man-crush again- was back in the Winners Circle with a double and shrugged off rumors that he’s having problems with his shoulders due to a vigorous Gangnam session on the dance floor at the end of last season with new best mate “Breet” Prebble- as they say in South Africa.
Diigliis and Breeeet in the bad old days.
“Oy, Guru, look at theeese!” The Whyte Man screamed out to me in his South Afrikaan accent during trackwork last week and shimmied his shoulders my way- in a kinda manly way- to show how supple they were and did a few moves which made me feel a tad uncomfortable but which made one particular trainer who was watching us get even hotter in his silk hot pants.
Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew!
On Sunday, as always, the Durban Turban has a good looking book of rides with at least one set of eyes firmly fixed on The Peak. Owned by, I hear a Malaysian entrepreneur and who many in Oz say is Dato Tan Chan Chin, one of the wealthiest horse owners in Oz- and they could be very wrong about this- the rumour is that if the latter, he called his great on/off/on friend Bart Cummings for his thoughts on The Peak’s disappointing last run- The Peak, surely being a tongue in cheek name for such a puny horse. The horse is built more like a mole hill.
The Peak which Dougie Whyte will ride at an all-time new low weight.
On Sunday, The Squeak, sorry, The Peak, has drawn barrier 12 of 14 over 1200 metres and Dougie Whyte will need to ensure that his fine motor skills are acutely honed. Can The Peak rise to the challenge? Maybe, but again, it will be well under the odds and faces some big dangers in Mr. Ginger- possibly related to Garlic Boy which is in Race 10 and has a big chance with both weirdly-named horses ridden by The Zac Attack. If The Squeak gets rolled, there could be another phone call from Dato Tan Chin Nam to Bart Cummings about the ride from a gentleman who once raced So You Think and should know all about the racing game. Guess not and who mentioned unnecessary pressure?
” Hmmmmm, feels like he’s passed his peak.”
As always in big Cup races, John “Moore The Merrier” Moore has entered another army of runners- five in all in the Oriental Watch Shatin Trophy with the withdrawal of his sixth runner for the race- Xtension. This means Little Timmy Clark not having a ride in the race and leaving him time to think more about his horse racing theme park which is not such a daft idea. More on this later.
Little Timmy Clark and some of his coming attractions at Little Clarkesville.
Getting back to Moore The Merrier, of course it would be against ” fair”trade practices” to restrict the number of runners a trainer enters in any one race, but I do wonder if this is good for racing? When one person has a mortgage on a race plus, even if not the case, that dark shadow of team riding hangs over the event and which makes me wanna just sit this race out and see what unfolds. Possible as much as the picture below.
John Moore is John Moore and he is an Untouchable and a Master Gunner in Hong Kong racing. Sometimes, however, he needs to be handled like a Cher song- the one that goes, Bang Bang.
Yes, he wins nearly every meaningful Cup race in Hong Kong, but when he has a coven or harem of owners who are willing to pay mega bucks to buy the best and which are then set for every Cup race, what can one do except yawn as it’s becoming so bloody tedious?
In fact, expect news soon of another mega expensive new Moore purchase. Two other trainers in Oz bidding for the same horse just walked away mumbling that what was being offered was silly money and there are many owners with Moore who are charter members of the Ministry Of Silly Walks and prepared to fork out more to Moore to get these Lolas what they want, and when they want it.
Personally, despite his army, I think John Size’s Glorious Days or “Millie” Millard’s Ambitious Dragon will be hard to toss in this race despite me having some nagging question marks over the latter horse. Of the Moore runners, I’d pick Irian and Zaidan- but with no real confidence. Sometimes, it’s quality and not quantity and even of quality, there just might be others with more of it. Jeez, that was a mouthful.
In the day’s Premier Bowl, Moore makes merry and possibly Mary with only four measly runners and his Captain Sweet being the favourite.But this race is notorious for throwing up roughies and I’d tread gently and look at the other Moore runners in Able City and Leading City with the Tony Cruz-trained El Zonda capable of upsetting the Moore apple cart. Frankly, take Captain Sweet outside of the equation and any of the horses could win.
So who is there to follow at Shatin? On paper, Dougie Whyte has excellent winning chances in Races 1 where the 2-5 quinella looks a solid 2 bet and with first-starter Maroon Prince [Tim Clark] very capable of knocking off hot favourite Fabulous November [Whyte], perhaps a chance in a competitive looking Race 8, Races 9 and 10 and with the Peak in Race 6 not getting a rise from me.
Then there’s Zac Purton who is riding in superb style and with big chances in Races 4, 9, 10 and possibly Race 11 where President Lincoln takes its place. If it rains, it will bring the horse right into calcaluations despite it needing a little further to really show its worth. The Zac Man rides a newcomer in Race 2 called Little Cow. If the jockey, I’d refuse to ride it on principle and the thought of hearing a race-caller mention that “Zac Purton is riding hard on Little Cow.”
Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew!
Any surprises? Well, apart from seeing the Racing To Win trio losing the barbershop candy-striped shirts and now looking sartorially splendid in dark blue shirts and white ties whiich make them look like something outta the Sopranos, yes, many surprises, but right now, it’s more just being disappointed with Cox Plate Day and the usual tedious post-mortems at JJ’s at Crown Casino. So, until the next time, love, peace, incense and peppermints and remember to spread the naan and give the ol’ brinjal a damn good working out.
The Guru
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